Blibber Blabber

No rhyme, no reason

 

You know what?  Fuck 'em.  Taking a cue from a good friend, I'm not going to let other people ruin my private life.  So come on in.  I may not like it that someone may be spying on me, but on the other hand, I have nothing to hide.

In addition to all the awful stuff that's gone on this week, I found out today that my granny is going to be put into a hospice.  Right now she's still in the hospital, sedated and recovering from dehydration.  She was so ill her kidneys had started to shut down. I don't know how bad her dementia got from it.

Yes, apparently she's now one of the many victims of nursing home neglect.  I don't know if the nursing home's going to be investigated, and more was going on, but she's out of there and in a good hospital right now, under the care of a doctor, nurse and two hospice workers.

She may fully recover.  The doctor doesn't seem to think so.  And while we all know that sometimes doctors' timetables are wrong, he may also be right.  She's been getting worse for a long while.

(I'm not crying right now because I cried earlier.)

Good thoughts for my granny, please.  I think most of all I just want her to be peaceful, in peace.  I want her to smile that beautiful smile, and be happy.

posted by: athenawj at 20:08 | link | comments (2) |
family

New Artwork Up!

I finally got all my pictures uploaded and my shop set up at Etsy.  Look around, tell your friends, tell your family, and enjoy!

My Shop at Etsy

posted by: athenawj at 07:48 | link | comments (2) |
art , etsy

I'm going to be busy today, yes?  I'm going to get into my yucky protective overalls-- the ones that keep the ants and bugsies and mean old weeds away from my skin-- and weed and clip the oregano and mints that just refuse to stop growing all over the friggin' place.  I'm going to dig up the hostas that just wilt and fry in the sun anyway and put them out of their misery.  I'm going to get those new marigolds and impatiens into the ground, and finally sow my zinnia and wildflower seeds.  I'm going to get after Mr. Calm to get out the weed whacker and get to work.

I'm going to get off my ass and into this cleansing sunshine, yes?  Yes.

***

I provided my daughters with some comic relief yesterday.  You see, I whacked myself in the front tooth with a butter knife.

I didn't mean to.  It just kept coming.  We were out at IHOP for lunch, and I was holding my butter knife aloft in my right hand.  I opened my mouth to speak, and WHACK!  There it went-- right into my tooth.  I gasped, my children burst into laughter.  Luckily, I thought it was just as funny, too.

It was just as funny as the time I flicked a balled up straw wrapper across a table at Mr. Calm.  It landed on the corner of his lower lip and stuck there.

Yes, we're juvenile.  But hey, laughter is good for the soul.

posted by: athenawj at 08:37 | link | comments (3) |
food, gardening, silly stuff

Lack of media responsibility: How is it pertinent to a national news story to report on the VT murderer and his family, show the apartment complex where his parents live, and then to close the story, have the reporter stand before the cross street signs, with the names visible?  Why, when a member of the family asks only to be identified by his last name, do they then print his full name in a caption under a picture of him (taken unawares) in his shop, with distinct graphic work on the window?  Is this "all the facts all the time", or something else?

As much as I feel for the victims, I feel for the killer's family, too.  I cannot imagine how devastating it must be to find out your child-- your child-- is capable of such violence.  And they lost their child, too.

There seems to be an air of forgiveness, and some VT students even put up a small memorial to the murderer on campus near his victims' memorials.  But there are definitely, and understandably, people who will not be able to forgive, and some may even turn to hate.  What I would hate is if someone in turn acted out against the family because of the media's lack of responsibility.

Off my soapbox...

Braces update (oh, aren't you excited?!): Day Three.  I must have been trying to clench my jaw while I was asleep, because I woke up tapping my teeth together.  Can't do that anymore!  Also can't blow air very well, or chew on a fingernail (which I rarely do anyway), or really bite into anything at the moment because it's my very front teeth and incisors that ache some.  I can chew, though, as long as I only use my molars.

The worst is how the left inside of my cheek and my lower lip are getting sore, and that only happens when I eat.  I'm not using the wax because it's not horrible, and I want my mouth to "toughen up".

The best is how my top right front tooth used to overlap the left front tooth some.  Now they're side by side.  I've never seen that before!  It's a-MA-zing. ;)  Sometimes I look in the mirror to marvel at it.  Yes, I need a life. ;)

YD has a friend spending the night.  She said, "Mom got braces!", and I showed her.  This girl has braces, too.  We smiled at each other, metalmouth to metalmouth.  It was funny.

posted by: athenawj at 07:08 | link | comments (2) |
metalmouth, un-pc

All right, peeps!  Braces are on-- all set to go!!

I feel like I have two sets of teeth now, and lips like Angelina Jolie.  I look strange.  My light purple thingies on my teeth are purty, though.

Don't ask for a pic yet, heh.

posted by: athenawj at 12:24 | link | comments |
metalmouth

Blibber Blabber post

We have new neighbors.  I just watched one of them leave for work-- a school bus driver.  It was interesting yesterday, watching that school bus back down the driveway.  I halfway expected it to back into the deck and knock it over.  Kudos to the driver for not doing that.

YD met the (I suppose) lady of the house while she was walking her dog two evenings ago.  Said she seemed very nice and friendly.  Contrast from the last folks who lived there... or maybe just the last lady of the house.  She was a sourpuss who let her little yappy dogs piss in our ditch and run into our yard if we weren't in it (I heard them, and I saw the peeing).  Having had unfortunate trouble with neighbors when I lived up north, I didn't say anything.  Probably would have if they'd pooped in the yard, though.

So, they were in and out of that house in about two years.  These new folks are the third residents.  Let's see how long they stay.

Talked with the girls a bit about college last night, especially since OD got some more invites from colleges.  Actually an art school here in town.  I'm offering my suggestions to her, since she still says she doesn't have an inkling what she wants to major in; suggestions on what I've seen her enjoy doing, is good at, etc.  What surprised me is that she said she might like culinary school, especially baking and pastry.  My response: "Girl, I would have had you in her helping me cook all the time if I'd known that!"

YD is a bit of a different story.  It's not imperative that she make up her mind now, being a freshman, but after years of instilling the value of college in both girls, what a HORRAH to find out she might just want to do something that doesn't require a four-year degree, but a specialty school.  And I have the right to my opinion that in today's world, that's not enough.  But I think we hit a compromise last night.  I said, "Find me a school where you can get a bachelor's in that, and you can go." And she said, "Okay."  Wow.  That was easy.

I see what's happened to my youngest sister.  Bright, articulate, imaginative, very good at her job, and she's worked over a decade to get where she is today.  And although she gets lauded in the company she is now, a bonus (trip to Hawaii!), and is well respected, she will never be able to get into top echelons of the company because she doesn't have a degree.  Completely unfair... but that's unfortunately the way it goes all too often.  I would hate for the girls to miss out on opportunities, too.

We recently found out that Mr. Calm's uncle in France has prostate cancer.  I told OD last evening, and she took it hard.  This is the uncle that she stayed with all last summer, and she grew really fond of him and her aunt and her two little cousins.  He starts chemo soon, and I do hope that he beats this, but I have no idea how far along the cancer is or what the prognosis is.  But no pessimism when I reassured OD.  Kids don't need that-- all she needed/wanted to hear was how he's strong and he can beat this.

I'm going to get as much artwork done today as I can-- I'm almost done working on the background on a canvas, have to draw and color the woman who will be in the forefront, and decoupage and seal it all.  Why will I be working so hard today?

Because next time I post, I'll be a member of Brace Face Nation!  Whoo-hoo!

But to be perfectly honest, I am a little scared.  Not only of the pain (there is one tooth in particular that I'm worried will hurt a LOT as it moves), but I've had these teeth for... well, since I lost my baby teeth.  You get used to looking at yourself a certain way.  Yourself looks at you a certain way.  These are my teeth, but in eight months: "Hey, those aren't my teeth!"  You know?

It will be strange after all these years to not look at my teeth and go, "Bleh".

My journal!  I can go on and on and on about it if I want! ;)

posted by: athenawj at 07:12 | link | comments (3) |
family, kids, real blibber blabber

Waaah!

Okay, I am trying really hard not to complain, especially to my family.  And like the good things that have come to us recently, I am truly grateful that I'm able to finally get braces.

Still.  I am DAMNfriggin'frackin' tired of gently mauling stuff with the edges of my teeth just to eat.  It's really taking away my love of food.  All the pleasure is gone when you're afraid to touch your teeth together with any sort of force.  I hate taking ibuprofen, but the last couple of days I've had to push that dislike aside just to be able to eat semi-comfortably.

I'm reminded more and more of my favorite character, Matthew Tribble.  Poor, handsome Matthew and his half a tongue.  When I was writing for him, I did research by trying to eat without using my tongue.  It's harder than you think, folks.  I gave myself a tooth freeze while trying to eat a very cold strawberry.

Well, at least I still have my tongue.

Diet news: still dieting (duh, I don't have much of a choice now), still exercising every day except this past Monday with my achy back.  My body was getting used to all the exercising, so I had to up it by three minutes today.  Feeling good about that.

 

posted by: athenawj at 14:17 | link | comments (6) |
diet, metalmouth

Art Shows

The art show in Seattle is entitled "Gates of Hell III", and it starts on October 6.  I have yet to get started ordering my prints and framing them, but at least I have them all picked out.

I'll also be in the Value Menu show here in town at the artists' co-op in June.  Nothing over 8x10 and $50.  I don't know yet what I'm putting in, but I'm sure I'll have enough pieces by the drop-off time. 

And then there's the Untitled show in June that I think I'm finally ready to enter something into.

So, plenty of artwork plans.

***

I'm finally happy with being a writer in the mornings and an artist in the afternoons/evenings.  It's the way it's always worked out, and the way it'll always be, I suspect.  I'm weaning myself off huge word counts and becoming happy with being able to get anything out.  Plenty of people are jacks of more than one trade, and I can be that, too.

***

I have the pesky owwies in my mouthie.  For dinner I had baked potato soup, and I mushed up all the chunks of potatoes with a fork.  My Around-Eight-O'Clock snack is always cereal with skim milk, and I let it get completely soggy, but that was still a little too much chomping.  ALL my teeth feel a little strange-- like they've been shoved together-- but it's only the back ones that I can't even touch together.  I imagine I look a bit like a moron, sans drool.

Oh, well.  I'll deal, for the end results. :D

posted by: athenawj at 07:28 | link | comments (3) |
art , writing, metalmouth

It's weird, but I feel really good today.  I mean, GOOD.

Maybe it's the upswing in the weather.  Maybe it's that my teeth are shiny and clean.  I totally passed out last night at eleven, exhausted from lower back pain and a long day, and woke up totally refreshed and with only a twinge or two in my back.  Got ready early and got all my writing/errands/cleaning/workout done by eleven a.m.  And wonder of wonders, I wasn't exhausted like usual (might be because I had to cut my workout by nine minutes this morning in order to make it to the dentist on time).

Maybe it's that next week my teeth will be on their way to being straightened, or maybe because after four weeks I'm still working out and eating well and feeling better.  Maybe it's because I've been more creative the last few weeks.  Whatever it is, whatever the combo, I hope this attitude stays on for awhile.

The only thing that bugs a little (and you knew something had to be coming, right? ;)) is that after eating a grilled sandwich for lunch, I think it's best I stick to softer foods til I get used to the braces.  Had a little bit of owwies afterward.  But hey, that's best for my diet, right?

As long as it ain't ice cream.  I don't like that much, so there's no worries there. ;)

Oh, also, I finished my first "Dead" portrait.  The title is (and the French still needs to be double-checked, so don't make fun if I got it wrong): "Le portrait du Mort #1: The Bride-to-Be Who Narrowly Missed Becoming a Ball and Chain".

Hee.

posted by: athenawj at 14:18 | link | comments (2) |

Well, the week's starting out better than last week seemed to go.  Although I wasn't able to exercise today, the diet's back on full-blast.

I got my spacers on this morning, and contrary to the gleeful way YD told me I'd be in pain, I'm not.  Feels weird to eat when you already feel like you have food stuck between your teeth, but it's only for ten days.  In the meantime, I can't have gum. :(  Tomorrow is the tooth cleaning, bleh.

Mr. Calm and OD went to NC for Easter to visit his family.  Someone got on the horn to say he was comin' home, and folks came from as far away as the Poconos for the holiday.  One of his aunts works for Burt's Bees, so guess who got a big bag of Burt's Bees stuff?   ME!  I love me some Burt's Bees!

 

posted by: athenawj at 19:29 | link | comments (3) |
family, diet

Breakdown #457

Got done exercising yesterday and had a horrible flash of pain in my right hand as I picked up my water bottle.  Did something to the muscle in the pad beneath my thumb, which meant that I had YD buckle my seatbelt while we ran errands and I used my left hand for pretty much everything else.  If I tried my right hand, it left me wincing and hissing.  Since I'm only a little sore today, I'm sure and thankful it wasn't my tendon.

It leads me to ask myself what YD asked yesterday, "What's up with you and your body parts?"  Exactly. Everything that's wrong with my hands and elbows is because of my wrists.  But I'm a writer and artist-- it's not like I can exactly stop what I'm doing. I actually think this injury was brought on by the way I hang onto the treadmill while I walk, and I DO try to alternate it-- hanging on for the heart rate scanner and just resting my wrists on top of the bar-- but I guess I didn't do it enough.  Guess it's back to the braces.

Fucking body parts, man.

In addition to mauling my hydrangea, I found out on Thursday that they'd also cut back by more than half my azalea bush, and cut the same amount off my golden ivy.  That ivy was an experiment of mine- it started out in 2001 as one of OD's science experiments, and when she was done I planted it in the ground.  One little pint had become five feet tall and about the same width across.  The ivy will grow again, but azaleas are not supposed to be cut this time of year.  Plus, we've got a freeze going right now at nights. So...

THANKS, GUYS!!!  Thanks for taking away almost all of my azalea buds (which were getting ready to bloom... I found the branches tossed into the yard), half my lovely ivy, and who knows?  You may've killed my hydrangea.  Oh, and I should probably thank the landlord, too, who probably just told them to trim everything without finding out what needed trimming in the first place.  Or caring.

Sorry for the crabby posts if you're reading.  Gotta get it out somewhere.

posted by: athenawj at 06:48 | link | comments (2) |
pain, gardening

Warm-Up

Warmup?  Warmup for what? ;)

Jesus Camp was not as upsetting or disturbing as I thought it would be.  Dunno-- I've heard it all before.  Although my eye-rolling skills reached new heights after seeing how the camp director made damn sure that the children associated religion with politics, then vehemently denied it while calling into a Christian radio show.

What hurt my heart though was the little boy who got up on the chancel the first night.  He was such a tiny thing-- blonde-haired, slight.  He spoke with such intelligence and pain; about how sometimes he wasn't sure if God existed ("God doesn't ever answer"), and that he didn't know if the Bible was the truth.  I think, in an atmosphere of evangelical Pentacostalism, that took a lot of guts.  Out of all the kids in the film (who were way too hardcore for my comfort), he was the one I sympathized with.  Whatever it is, I hope he finds comfort someday.

Fast Food Nation: I remember the big to-do when this premiered at a festival, but I don't remember it ever being released.  Parts of it were marvelous-- the parts with the Mexicans, Greg Kinnear, and Bruce Willis has a fabulous cameo.  There was a subplot about a girl who worked at the Mickey's fast food restaurant, and how she joined up with some college students that bored me to sleep-- all of that could and should have been cut to streamline the story.  I generally don't care if someone politicizes a film-- and I walked right into this one expecting it-- but WOW.  How boring.

Having said all that, I don't think I'll forget certain images at the end of the movie.  I actually had to turn away, and I was crying.  In a way, it was another political moment, but this one I could not help but let affect me.  I have not had red meat since watching the movie... and I don't know if I, in good conscience, can eat it in a fast food place again.  And that's weird, because I never thought hamburger patties came from the Hamburger Fairy.

Or maybe that will pass.  After all, I've eaten peanut butter for years, cockroach legs and all.  Then again, that's a little different than the reason why Greg Kinnear's character began investigating the UMC packing plant.

"There's shit in the hamburgers."

 

posted by: athenawj at 06:59 | link | comments |
movies

So, on April 19, I will be the newest member of the Brace Face Brigade.  Yes, at the ripe old age of 36, I'm getting braces!  We had the consult yesterday with the girls' orthodontist, put down the down payment, and I'll be wearing braces for about eight months.  Getting 'em off just in time for Christmas, heh.

I am NOT getting the jaw work done.  Since I'm done growing, I'd have to get surgery, which means my jaw would have to be cut in four places, moved, and steel rods put into place.  Um, NO.  I'll just get my teeth straightened, thankyouverymuch.

Mr. Calm promised to call me Brace Face from time to time, since, as he said, I "missed out on that as a kid."

***

On the downside of things, the landlord finally got off her butt and hired a couple of guys to come clean the gutters and patch up those holes.  They also went to work on the bushes out front of the house.  I planted a tiny hydrangea bush two years ago.  This was the year it was finally supposed to bloom, and it's been growing nicely.  I don't know what those JERKS did, but it looks like they trampled it-- it's all broken, short, and all the leaves are torn in half!

It really upset me and pissed me off. I planted pennies to get blue flowers, I've been taking care to make sure it's never flattened by the water hose or mowed over, and kept the slugs away.  And now this shit.  My last hope is that they didn't mangle it so much that it dies.  JERKS.

posted by: athenawj at 08:04 | link | comments (3) |
gardening, dammit, bullshit, metalmouth

As of yesterday, I'm now mom to a fifteen-year-old again.  YD chose The Aquarium as her birthday dinner destination.  Atmosphere and the aquariums were terrific, but I can't say that about the food.  The calamari was tasteless, and Mr. Calm didn't care for most of his fisherman's platter.  I sort of got grossed out by my third stuffed shrimp.  Yes, I'm allergic to shrimp/shellfish.  Most of the time, it's okay-- if you're allergic reactions are centered in your stomach, you're not suddenly going to turn around and go into anaphylactic shock.  Straight from my allergist's lips.

Um, but don't go tan after you eat something you're allergic to.  I was an overheated, grossly nauseated mess by the time I got home.  Stupid, stupid!  I halfway wanted to stick my finger down my throat just to get it over with (but I didn't).

Big News maybe soon!  Stay tuned! :D

posted by: athenawj at 07:07 | link | comments (1) |
food, family, kids

I went to my first non-church auction yesterday.  Fascinating and boring.  It was mostly arcade games.  We got way outbid on a 1958 Stereophonic jukebox with ALL the 45s.  Went for $675-- worth $2500.  We were able to pick up a NIB Dora the Explorer Quad for my niece for her birthday in June waywayWAY under retail price.  I think she'll enjoy it.  2 MPH-- Whoo-hoo!  Speed demon!

Took the girls to their first art gallery opening last night.  Normally it isn't crowded, but it was packed to the gills last night.  I realize that the co-op members have to provide food themselves, but I had to laugh at the table laden with Cheez Whiz and wine in a box.  YD had the gall to ask me if I could share a glass of champagne with her.  Um, NO.  What happens in France does not happen here, kiddo.

No art purchased, but we did get some really cool handmade earrings made by the Crafty Wench here in town.  One pair of mine are retro Mickey Mouse.  And I add one more piece to my Disney apparel that I wear when I visit the World (actually, I only have a t-shirt and hat-- I'm not a nut).

I've decided to start a series of small portraits based on the photographs (and paintings) that used to be taken of dead people.  I'm going to experiment with crackle finish on these, but I'm not sure how it'll turn out so some practice is in order.  Will they sell?  Don't know, don't care-- just want to do it.

I'm hoping in a month to have enough canvases ready to be able to photograph them and put them up on my site/Myspace page.  Stay tuned! :)

posted by: athenawj at 08:33 | link | comments (3) |
art